Do not read this post if you are offended by the f-bomb.

This is a rough draft and I'm stuck on the title.

"The Day the Dogs Ran Away and Onto I-394"

"The Day the Motherfucking Dogs Ran Away and Ended up on Motherfucking I-394"

"Thanksgiving 2013: The Day I Hurled the F-Bomb at a Perfect Stranger"

"Open Letter to the Lady on Xenia Who Rolled Her Window Down to Yell, 'YOU THINK THE FUCKING RED LIGHTS DON'T APPLY TO YOU,' When I Burned Through the Red Light at Golden Hills Drive Because There Was Zero Traffic at the Intersection and I was Racing to Save My Motherfucking Dogs Who Ran Away and Ended up on Motherfucking I-394; I'm Not Sorry I Yelled Back at You, 'HAPPY FUCKING THANKSGIVING.'"

"Thanksgiving 2013: What Kind of Maniac Would Quit Drinking on a Thanksgiving Holiday?"

"Thanksgiving 2013: What Kind of Idiot Would Quit Drinking on a Thanksgiving Holiday, Especially One in Which Her Motherfucking Dogs Ran Away and Ended up on Motherfucking I-394?"