My pitch

I have totally awesome idea for the next great reality TV show. My latest favorite show is Kitchen Nightmares. There's nothing more entertaining than watching some dysfunctional restaurant staff scream and yell at each other while they cook terrible food in a filthy kitchen all the while being publicly humiliated by a renowned chef who later saves their restaurant from total catastrophe.

Or is there?

I propose a similar show but one where the chef comes to my house and curses at me and yells at me for serving my family Easy Mac and Pizza Rolls for supper five nights a week. He could give the audience a tour of my pantry filled with Pop-Tarts, Cheez-its, and months-old rice and flour spillage. He would yell at me some more and I would cry then he would hug me and teach me a secret recipe that could become the signature Bickerson dish, like Tamale Pie. And there would be a follow-up show where everyone could see how the new menu and signature dish had transformed our lives, made the children behave and get better grades, and saved the world from armageddon. Or something like that.